Honesty is integral for achieving real empowerment.
Without honesty we never really know what we truly want. Dishonesty within, will struggle against any developments in awareness. The two are fundamental opposites. To be honest with ourselves means to listen and see – even when what we hear and see is not particularly to our liking. It is the difference between telling ourselves what we like, want and feel – and listening to what we actually like, want and feel.
Honesty is the reality as it is, not as we want it to be.
Without looking and perceiving clearly what reality is here and now, we are living in delusion – a state which must be cleared before the path to our destination becomes clear. We need to start where we are. We must listen to the many voices that speak within us. The many feelings that rise to be heard – and then we must ask what is the meaning of this communication?
When we create an internal governor, an entity or aspect of our mind that will stand for the purpose and meaning for our highest good, then we have the opportunity to bring understanding and unity to the other selves. First we must hear them speak, and to truly hear we must be willing to be honest.
Honesty reveals the way through and to all levels of the self.
Perhaps one aspect of the self is restless or agitated. In listening we will understand why there has been struggle in this area, and so we gain the opportunity to resolve and reconcile. This cohesion brings inner peace at this level. Perhaps another part is grieving and in listening honestly, we gain the opportunity to understand why it is grieving, and so we gain the opportunity to find healing.
Without honesty we choose to live in the dark and yet wonder why the feelings, thoughts and reality that we have are not the ones we want. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result is truly insane. In being honest we allow ourselves to look and see the cause and effect of our actions. We gain the opportunity to ask: “Is this what I truly want? Or do I desire a change in paths?”
Honesty is congruent with the development of observation and self-awareness. On one level honesty is admitting that we do indeed desire a particular experience, be that emotional, physical or mental. On another level observation may show us whether or not the path we are on will likely bring us that experience. If for example we seek empowerment, are the choices and actions we take supporting the creation of that reality? Are we feeling more empowered overall than we were last year? If we would like to have more fulfilling relationships, are the choices and actions that we have taken supporting the reality of this desire? Are we experiencing more fulfillment here and now than we have in the past?
Honesty allows us to achieve results in a concrete way. Rather than hoping that chance will throw a bone our way, we systematically learn to know ourselves and understand the nature of cause and effect. Understanding brings empowerment.
Mechanically speaking honesty is easy. It is the simplest way to true fulfillment. In practice it is challenging because of pride.
If we do not want to “lose”, then we may hold back from admitting that we already have. Until we allow ourselves to look honestly at what is actually happening here and now, we don’t have a chance of creating our reality with any conscious direction. It all just keeps rolling from the product of our past patterns and reactions.
The honesty path although it may require us to look at some truths that sting, actually allows us to create a life that is imbued with experiences that contain for us meaning and purpose. In retrospect the sting of honesty will be like water off a ducks back. It’s this experience that allows people to genuinely laugh at themselves, because they have elevated themselves above the part of their ego that would do anything to avoid that sting, that feeling of loss.
In letting that part lose, we actually win – big time.
We laugh because we experience real inner victory. We see what we have gained and realize the experience of that sting of pride for what it is. No big deal.
In the long run we gain exponentially more by allowing ourselves to grow than holding ourselves back. At the top of the mountain the pride that we gain from having achieved so much far outweighs any pride lost in the journey. Furthermore the journey itself has shown us the transient nature of pride itself – and so we learn to laugh at ourselves, because we can see that regardless of our “flaws” and “foibles” we are capable of climbing mountains!
Be honest about your strengths and be honest about your weaknesses. Each has the capacity to help the other.
Admitting that things have not worked out, that our “causes” have not had the “effects” that we desired, we actually get the biggest opportunity to make a major overhaul. It’s like a company realizing that a certain product just isn’t selling. If they don’t want to admit that they might have been wrong on something, then they continue to lose. If they admit that for some reason it’s just not working, then they gain opportunities to turn it around.
Hear what the inner critic has to say, but know that just because the voice comes from within, it doesn’t mean that it’s the last word. Develop the inner governor, a voice of reason and wisdom that can communicate with all the other aspects of yourself with understanding and compassion, but also firmness. It is the part of you that will listen but then make the decisions that need to be made. It is that part that listens with understanding, responds with compassion and acceptance, but is still able to do what is needed. In short it is the councilor who hears, loves and respects the child’s voice yet knows that there are other considerations also. It is the higher self that sees from a bigger perspective that can understand the paths that lead to fulfillment and those that are dead-ends. The honesty exists in listening to all concerns openly, knowing that they may come in the form of thoughts, words or feelings and emotions. The strength exists in allowing the honesty to be there. It also exists in learning how to meet each aspect of the self with understanding while still directing a larger, higher and more expansive picture.
Each aspect, each voice has a purpose, a reason for being that is connected with us. Understanding that purpose gives us the opportunity to integrate directions and find reconciliation within. All aspects of the self have an honesty that is revealed when we are honest with ourselves. Meeting each one openly and allowing the inner governor to genuinely seek understanding with each is the essence of honest communication.